FEBRUARY 1 / ODUSOLA AYOMIKUN

The Books That Met Me Where I Was.

Have you ever caught yourself pausing just before speaking 🤐, wondering how your words might land? Or replayed a conversation hours later 🤔🙄, wishing you had shown up a little differently?

If you’re a young adult, chances are you’ve been there. I know I have. And interestingly, it wasn’t lectures or motivational speeches that helped me untangle those moments; it was books. Quiet, patient books that never interrupted, never judged, and always waited for me to be ready.

Somewhere in my awkward, juvenile steps into adulthood, I realised something unsettling: no one hands you a manual for life. One day, you’re confident and sure of yourself; the next, you’re overthinking a text message from three hours ago. Same phone. Same you. Completely different emotional weather 🌦️.

I carried trembling concerns about life, constantly measuring myself against what I thought adulthood should look like. I worried I was failing at it or worse, being painfully mediocre. That season found me roaming mentally and emotionally, searching for answers I didn’t yet know how to ask.

I needed guidance on everything: emotions, relationships, purpose, identity. How do you grow up without losing yourself? How do you speak without overexplaining? How do you love without fear? How, exactly, does one become an adult?

Every morning, I woke up ruminating. Would today be better than yesterday? Would I be cool and composed, or sarcastic with a terrible sense of humour? What would I say when she finally texted back? Would I respond with grace, or overthink every minor folly and sideways shade? Honestly, I was spiralling 🌀.

I was definitely losing it.

Then, three months ago, something shifted. I stumbled upon an ivory goldmine tucked away on a dusty library shelf 📚. There they were, staring right back at me stacked with quiet wisdom and unassuming confidence. Those books held answers to the misery I had been nurturing for far too long.

They didn’t shout. They didn’t rush me.

They simply spoke slowly, gently and for the first time in a while, I listened.

'The Courage to Be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga' gave me the greens at first 😅. Rooted in Adlerian psychology, it unfolds as a dialogue between a philosopher and a frustrated young man who kept asking questions I had been silently avoiding for years.

The idea that I didn’t need everyone to like me felt both freeing and terrifying. I began to notice how often I shaped my choices around approval, and how exhausting that invisible performance had been. Kishimi nudged me toward choosing authenticity over applause. And surprisingly? The world didn’t end 🌍.

Then came 'The Confidence Code by Katty Kay and Claire Shipman', which shattered my belief that confident people simply “woke up like that.” Drawing from years of interviews with powerful leaders, the authors show that confidence isn’t a personality trait, it’s a practice.

This was a relief. It meant I didn’t have to feel ready before starting; I just had to start. As someone who once waited endlessly for the perfect moment (spoiler alert: it never came), this book nudged me toward imperfect action. That shift alone made a noticeable difference 💡.

For the longest time, I believed social interaction had to feel like an Oscar-worthy performance 🎭 flawless lines, perfect delivery, no mistakes. Then I encountered 'How to Talk to Anyone by Leil Lowndes', and that myth quietly fell apart.

Lowndes, who once struggled socially herself, breaks communication into simple, almost obvious habits. The kind you underestimate until you actually try them. I learned that listening is often more impressive than talking, and that people enjoy conversations where they feel seen. Suddenly, networking and small talk felt less awkward and more human.

Despite being written decades ago, Dale Carnegie’s 'How to Win Friends and Influence People' remains remarkably accurate about human behaviour. Shaped by his experiences as a teacher and speaker, Carnegie emphasises empathy, appreciation, and restraint.

Applying these lessons made me more mindful of how I respond to people, especially during disagreements. It taught me that kindness isn’t weakness, and that understanding others often resolves more issues than trying to prove a point ever could 🤍.

Looking back, these books didn’t magically turn me into a flawless adult with all the answers and honestly, I’m glad they didn’t. What they gave me were better tools, healthier perspectives, and permission to grow at my own pace.

They helped me unlearn the fear of being disliked, redefine confidence, communicate more intentionally, and relate to people with greater care. For a young adult navigating life one awkward moment at a time, these books didn’t just educate me they met me exactly where I was.

So here’s a question for you, dear reader:

Which of these lessons resonates most with your journey, and how might your life look different if you embraced it today? ✨📚

Note: Books can be downloaded or purchase on any booking platform.